If you squeeze an orange you get sweet orange juice. If you squeeze a lemon you get sour lemon juice. What comes out if you are squeezed? What comes out is what fills you. If you are filled with doubt, fear, anger, despair, anxiety, etc. – that is what will come out when faced with pressure and adversity. If you are filled with hope, joy, helpfulness, wonder, gratitude, love, etc. – that is what will come out when faced with pressure and adversity. It just feels better if good stuff comes out.
So how do we get to the good stuff if we are filled with the bad stuff? It is quite simple (not easy but simple). Remember the concept that what you think about and hold central in your mind is what comes about (and grows)? We simply need to shift our thoughts and focus to what we want to come about. That, in my humble opinion, starts with love. It is very hard to hold all those negative things central if you can simply focus on love instead.
What sort of love you might well ask? The sort of love by a person:
- Who wants to hold the door open for someone.
- Who wants to help a stranger with that.
- Who takes great joy in seeing the calmness of a beautiful sunset or sunrise.
- Who looks forward with eager anticipation to making a special treat for that special person.
- Who imagines the fabulous reason that person who cut you off must be heading to.
- Who enjoys noticing the lights being green to help you get to where you need to be on time.
- Who revels in the growth of the kiddies in your life.
- Who learns from and does not repeat mistakes (rather than feeling done in by them).
- Who learns from adversity but does not dwell on it.
Starting to get the idea? Make your own list of stuff you love and will love. This is not the time for goals and achievement. This is a time for just being and being in love.
When is the best time for this to become a central focus of you life? Right now! Don’t you just love that? And how often should you focus on this? Easy one. Always!
If you need to remember that the past is done, do that. It happened, it is done. It will only define you if you let it. Do not let it define you. That was then, this is now – now what?
Of course there are things that happen that you really hate and wish fervently had never happened. But it did. Just think about the actual facts, not the emotions. Adjust to whatever new facts exist today and live on with love in your heart for the lessons and challenges you received. It is what it is! Focus on love.
I close as always with “Live well, love always and laugh out loud every day”.